Happy 7th Birthday Dakota!

Dear Dakota,

I wanted you to know that before I had you, I had a different outlook on life. Before you, I didnt really understand life in general.

Sure, I was a mom, a wife, I worked full time, I went through daily living. But I didnt know. I didnt know what I know now. And it isnt something I can explain. Every other mother or father of a child with special needs, understands. But explaining it to someone else is  impossible.

See, as you were growing in my womb, you were growing into something so totally special! And I didnt know. I rubbed my tummy, I sang you to, Skylar and I told jokes to you, and daddy even whispered softly to you. I often wonder if you remember these moments.

And then the day you presented yourself to the world. I was not afraid. I was so strong and stoic. I was so happy! I watched the tears and fears of others and wondered if they saw the same boy as me? I was proud of you already! I knew you were chosen for me, and me for you. I knew at that moment, we were both chosen for greater things. I knew - you were going to change my world.

When I first heard the words Down syndrome enter my life,I wasnt afraid, but I did avoid it. I wasnt sure what to do with it, it sounded weird passing my lips. Today, its as common as any other word for me. And I still dont fear the future. And that is all because of you! My precious son! You have a way of taking my heart out of my chest, hugging it and laughing with that infectious laugh and putting it back whole. My heart that jumps out of my chest when you are trying to be brave, doing something new. My heart that breaks when someone stares or whispers. My heart that skips a beat when you reach for me to hug me or kiss me.

I am not sure if you know this, Dakota, but baby you are amazing. Everyone who meets you and knows you, LOVES you! You sure dont say much, but you dont have too! One look at those beautiful blue eyes, the sparkle that radiates from them... well we are fallen hook, line and sinker for you!

I hope one day, I can be the mom you think I am. I know I am not perfect, but do know I am always trying my best and I will protect you til the very very end! You are my best friend. And I will always be yours.

Today marks the day 7 years ago, when I got one of the most precious gifts in my life. How can I possibly thank God enough for you? I know that I cant. But I will do whatever it takes to make sure you are taken care of and loved more then you could ever fathom.

Happy Birthday, Handsome!

Love Mommy